”I started to fall in love with him after a certain period of time. When he proposed again I said yes. We got married in 2011. I met him while I was volunteering at the International Indian Film Academy Awards in Amsterdam. He seemed friendly and through the Organization he got my phone number. He texted me and every now and then we kept in touch. In 2010 he was in Amsterdam and he came by my house. To my surprise he asked me to marry him. I barely knew him so I kindly refused. But he kept sending me messages and kept traveling to Amsterdam to come and meet me. He made me feel special and he was very nice to me. At some point I was in love and he took good care of me. ”The day we got married everything changed. Our wedding was big and many people were invited. I noticed a change in his behaviour. He acted differently but I couldn’t really pinpoint what it was. After the party he left and he disappeared for our wedding night. He slowly changed from a loving man into a dominant husband. Before we got married he would tell me I was beautiful and give me compliments but once we were married he told me I dressed terribly and slowly started tarring down my confidence. I love meeting new people but he made sure I didn’t become friends with his friends. He would tell me they were using drugs or that they were cheating on their wives. That way he made sure I didn’t mingle with his friends. Later on I found out that he would tell his friends that I was an abusive wife and that I only married him for his money.
Every time he would be abusive he would tell me the next day that he was sorry and that it was all his fault. He promised me he would change. I kept giving him chances, but a man who beats you once will beat you again. In April we went on a family vacation to Dubai and when we returned he went back to India. I called him the next day but didn’t hear from him in days and when he did pick up his phone he said he was busy. A few days later he had written my brother and friends and said that I was going to pay for this and that he was going to shame my name and would tell everyone what a terrible woman I was. From that day he made our lives impossible.
After 3 years of marriage I got pregnant. When I gave birth to Insiya, he left me alone with the baby. 6 weeks after our daughter was born the traveling back and forth started again but it was almost impossible. Traveling with a newborn is exhausting and by the time she was 6 months old we had traveled to India over 6 times. I was taking care of our daughter alone. He never fed or changed her diaper. I felt like a single mother in a marriage. After we got married he also became physically violent.
Even after what he had done I still wanted Insiya to be able to have a relationship with her father. One day he came over and while she was sitting on his lap he said that he would send his friends over to have me killed. He said that he would kidnap our daughter and that he would take her to India. When judge decided that I became the primary and legal custodian of our daughter. It damaged his ego and as a response he started telling people that I was mistreating our daughter. I was scared all the time.
One day during my absence few men had come to my mother’s house pretending they were working for the municipality and were government officials. When one of the strange men saw Insiya, he grabbed her and took her to his car. When I got home Insiya was already gone. Ever since that day my life has been a complete nightmare. For two weeks after the violent kidnap, I had no idea where Insiya was. As far as I know she in Mumbai with her father who she barely knows. He has said that if I will go to India he will have me arrested. He is a wealthy and powerful man and he easily buys people off. He has hired one of the best lawyer of The Netherlands to defend him. I haven’t talked to my daughter since she has been kidnapped. Despite my countless efforts, he will not let me talk to my 2 year old daughter. Together with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and the Dutch government we are trying our utmost best to get Insiya back. Every day from morning until night I am working on this. I will not stop until I can hold my daughter again. I want to hold Insiya in my arms and never let her go. I wake up at night and it hurts so much to not have her near me. She used to sleep hugging me every night. Who will my baby hug now?”
Via – Humans of Amsterdam